Is self pity the same as self compassion ? No
No they are not the same thing
One is inclusive of other humans and connected the other is exclusive and isolating.
Both are dealing with suffering.
They are not interchangeable and this question I came to today while making some lunch after amother very long day has been a unexpected windfall of grace and this key piece of me asking the question started a snowball effect of me seeking out or reaching out for information in the world of the internet – the search for clarity is worth the surrender of thinking we know and the labours you hold onto ; there is merit for holding onto problems in order to see them but there needs to be some grace or light at the end of the tunnel – faith feels different than actually getting knowledge – the knowledge can be like learning to fish at this level you are the one in the boat ; and your self is the one that is in conversation. Asking for a better rod is okay if it means you can move on from a scarce haul. It’s okay to yield goods from the sea ; you need not overly identify with a small haul as representative of you but you can continue having lower yields when you shape the story in certain ways – to be one of the fisherman who did or didn’t get a good haul today is not the same as “ this never works out this is just how it is “ further isolating oneself down a whirlpool into a sunken pit of despair or whatever feelings are there- self pity is a woesome beast and I now am more liberated in my self by seeing that when I pity myself I’m the one causing a sense of isolation. Self compassion began coming up as a theme I was starting to be attracted to but did not understand; not until I have been facing such hard times and have been able to be more honest with myself would I see that sharing my suffering even in my own mind ; that it was or is like Jeff or like that guys life; the pain and hold on suffering when it slips into its only me is a cause and the effects could be that we personally believe that we can only go this way to get what we need or want . Honour can become overwork when we bind ourselves to the job and the outcome of it ; when we make that our full responsibility that same code and principle can take us into hardcore territory – very nasty places – when we start to realise it’s in our own minds and admit that to ourselves well we are in the right place – careful not to judge too early or too hard as discernment and judgement have a place, but as it come to self compassion I’ve avoided lumping myself in with others like me for unique reward , an and because I had an inner sense that grouping around a identity and name and the whole notion of labelling and boxing , it’s real ; it’s real and I’m proving my intuition is right and thst anti forces that exist in the system level are harmful . Some thrive in the old ; some not; me not , resilience .
So the lesson is can you share your winnings as much as your failures and your bliss as your suffering … if it’s skewed there you will lay a marker to remember by even if it s later on. Small wins are to be celebrated this is a big win in a bigger story . This is not a small feat to give your self the this doesn’t make you weak it show your courage as being vulnerable then getting hurt does , then doing your best to contextualise it. It’s not the end of the road but it’s a relief based on mercy and if you can give mercy in this area you could give a gift worth more than words.
Here read this it’s what I first got
Brendon Rowley Dowley
brendon Dowley 
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